Realization is the child of reflection. I reflect a lot now about what it is to be me. Being me is not a purpose but a journey. It was not until I accepted the fact that I was not supreme in my world and laid my heart and desires before God that I found the time to be all the things He wants me to be and not what I think I should be. I realized that in my quest to “grow up” I have lost who I am and my journey was leading me towards a mythical place called happiness that could only be reached with the implementation of the newest idea I had of what happiness is. I realized that I need to “grow down” and stop imposing what I think should be while ignoring what is.
The most important realization for me is that success is not survival, position is not happiness, and possessions are not my defining feature. In the hunt for success, whatever that measure may be, we are crushing the survival of others. To gain position we are enhancing our perceived happiness at the expense of others. The drive for possessions is, in us, creating idols of those who have and ignoring those who do not.
I find peace now in someone else’s laugh, for I no longer want to know why they are laughing but am happy they are laughing and have found joy. I find calm now in someone else’s tears and embrace the expression of emotion and not think of my comfort level. I find love now in the intense joy in a toddler’s eyes when they find a pretty flower, for to me it is a flower but to the child it is the whole world; a world that is innocent, loving and pure.
My perceived responsibilities as an adult have robbed me of this love for simplicity. My perceived duties as an adult have created in me a person that no longer sees the flowers. It is through trust and submission to God that I have been able to gear the mind down and embrace the little things; the little things that used to be my world, that is until I “Grew Up”.
Therefore, I must endeavour to “Grow Down”.